Are you feeling scared to travel solo? Many wannabe solo travellers all have the same thought pattern. They want to see the world and explore somewhere new, but they feel too scared to go. They think that all the other solo travellers out there are the brave ones and they are just not that type of person.
Taking the first step
Let me tell nearly every single person feels scared to travel solo. The only way get rid of that fear is to just go. You have to take that leap of faith.
Many solo travellers sit in front of the laptop too scared to book that dream trip. They go back and forth thinking “should I do this?”. This is completely normal. Everybody goes through this frozen in fear stage. Yes you should do it. Book that flight.
I took my first solo trip in 2005. I went all out and booked a year to Australia, New Zealand and SE Asia. Was I scared? You bet! Absolutely terrified. It was probably, however, the single best decision I’ve ever made. I caught the travel bug and have since moved overseas and visited 85 countries in total.
Stretching your comfort zone
Taking the first steps towards solo travel is the hardest. Your fear dissipates and bravery grows the more you push yourself to do things that scare you.
I spent years traveling and went to places like Patagonia in winter on my own. My bravery grew the more the countries I visited. It’s not that I never felt scared or anxious, it’s just that I always pushed my comfort zone and didn’t let fear stop me.
Grounded
Then bang, along came covid! I was stuck in Hong Kong for a full two years.
My world travel and worn out passport turned into a little bubble of comfort and an overused Netflix account. My comfort zone shrank.
For a while, life was like the Trueman Show. My daily routine consisted of; walking out of my apartment, eating meals in safe restaurants, or going for well known hike on familiar routes.
Nothing was stretching my comfort zone. Eventually I became anxious at the thought of leaving the safety of Hong Kong, even though I so badly wanted to travel again. The thought of travelling solo again was terrifying to me.
What had happened? Was I not a traveler anymore?
I had a whole internal identity crisis. I’m a traveler, this is what I do. This is who I am. Now I’m scared of my own shadow.
Breaking through fear barriers to travel solo
In the summer of 2023 I visited family in Wales then went on to Poland, non of this was solo travel. Until it was.
I was left in Gdańsk to continue my trip around Europe. I was on my own now. I was so scared to travel solo, that I considered flying home. Ok that’s it, I’ve accepted my fate, I’m no longer a traveler. Im too scared to travel solo again.
I couldn’t just give in to fear though. I forced myself to stay in Europe and go somewhere new. Somewhere out of my comfort zone. I booked a city centre hotel in Porto and walked nervously around this new city. I dropped metaphorical peanuts with every step I took so as not to get lost. I’m terrible with directions and feared getting lost.
Everyday I started to feel braver and my comfort zone grew. I walked a little further everyday and dropped a few less peanuts, until I got lost and it didn’t bother me.
What I learned is that bravery is cultivated through pushing back at fear. If something scares you, that doesn’t mean you shouldn’t do it and give up. It means you should “feel the fear and do it anyway”. The more you allow fear to stop you from doing things, the more your world and comfort zone shrinks.
Elastic bands stretch, so does your comfort zone
Your comfort zone is not set in stone. There is not a set amount of bravery designated to an individual person. The more you allow fear to stop you from doing things, the more your comfort zone shrinks. The more you push yourself to do things that feel uncomfortable, the bolder you get. This works with all fears, not just the feeling of being scared to travel solo.
When I hear people say, you’re so brave, I’d love to travel solo, but I’m feeling too scared. I would like to say this ‘courage is cultivated in those who take risks and do things that scare them’.
Be brave. Take risks. Do things that scare you. Your comfort zone is a flimsy wall made of paper and your own self defeating thoughts, not bricks. It’s easy to break that wall of fear down, by just being scared and doing it anyway. Fear won’t kill you, but sitting around waiting to feel brave enough to do something will waste your short life.
Now go and book those flights! Remember, everybody feels a bit scared when they first travel solo.
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